Symphony
by audi katia
Summary: Lily was the very apparition of illumination in physical form. She was positively lustrous with an aria. :::Snape dreams at the YuleBall. slight DH spoilers:::


As he did not know whose idea it had been to make the Great Hall look as though it were a winter wonderland, Severus Snape was not sure who he should direct his anger at. This, however, was no problem for it only allowed him to be sour towards everyone. Yes, Severus was quite good at being sour and sullen. Some would say that he thrived off it.

Severus watched his colleagues and students frolic about the Great Hall, sneering the entire time. He eyed them in their colorful robes and excited expressions, and felt nearly sick to his stomach. Layers of annoyance and dreary black robes adorned him, excluding him from the rest of the cheery crowd.

The night so far was laced with idle conversation and sheer boredom. Severus was only present for the Yule Ball under Dumbledore's orders. He was required to watch over the students. He could not begin to fathom why he was needed to chaperone the miscreants that traipsed about the Great Hall. With a leer on his face, Severus observed the sickening actions of the students around him.

The champions had already shared their dance together; Severus had been almost happy to see the Potter boy look nervous. He might have smiled if that oaf Hagrid had not been crying tears of joy beside him. Severus now roamed his black eyes over the crowd, looking for misdemeanors that he could possible punish people for.

However, he was soon disappointed. Yes, Fred Weasley was dancing like a fool, but he was not harming anyone. Yet. Cedric Diggory and Cho Chang seemed to be a bit too comfortable in the one corner, but as far as Severus could see, they were not doing anything indecent. Draco Malfoy was staring haughtily into the center of the dancing crowd; his face mirroring what Severus was sure to be nasty, little thoughts. Perhaps Severus would talk to the boy later, make sure he was not planning anything Dark.

But now, he decided, was not the time for that. Severus, feeling useless and full of Hogwarts food, was most exhausted, and could not bring himself to leave his chair. Instead, he shifted himself into a slightly more comfortable position and allowed his eyes to shut, blocking out the glaring lights ricocheting off the icicles.

In the background, Severus could still hear that blasted band making noise that he refused to call music. The cheers and laughter of the crowd surrounding him were disgusting to hear as he tried to block them out. Thankfully, he was successful. The outside noise was slowly becoming fainter and fainter before fading out all together while the clanging instruments became more melodious.

The music was now indefinable as anything Severus had ever heard before. At most, he thought it sounded similar to finely crafted instruments being adjusted, making soft noises before reaching perfection.

Moist eyes opened to a view he never imagined.

The Great Hall had slowed into a smooth dazzle of chrome and motion. The previous sound of robes swishing about ankles grew into white noise. The steps of shoes on the hard floor turned to soft padding as the melted colors swirled about.

Feeling a likeness similar to wonder, Severus peered into the crowd, feeling his body sway on the spot. Hazy eyes turned sharp as he reached the center.

There, in the most beautiful, blinding light was Lily Evans. Severus felt sweet warmth within his chest, a delicate balance forming in his life. All was well and there was no harm to come.

Lily stood there, her arms outstretched towards him. Severus never felt his feet hit the floor, as though he were floating or even flying to her. Her dress robes were a silvery white, billowing out from her slender form. Within the folds of the fabric, he could see patterns and threads rolling over the satiny material. Above the crush of silk and pearls, porcelain skin was stained by vermillion hair tumbling from her crown in wild waves.

But it was when he looked into her emerald orbs that he realized the music was now sharp and flawless.

The music filled his heart; it was emitting from Lily, it seemed. The glow of the symphony issued from within her, creating a more celestial image. Severus could hear the build of music as he finally came to Lily.

"Hello, Sev," she smiled at him, her voice as musical as he could remember. Her outstretched arms were enticing him to come ever closer. Obliging his hopes, he stepped to her, reaching out to touch her hands.

The skin was as smooth and cool as he could remember. Yet, they felt like a material that his own skin kept sliding off of without a firm hold. It was not until Lily smiled ever broader and curled her pale fingers around his thick set hand.

At the moment of her touch, the harmony exploded around them like a supernova. Severus and Lily waltzed as one, their backgrounds forgotten in the midst of their love.

Severus could not ever remember feeling this way, not since Lily had left him. It was like a liquid fire pulsing through his veins, equal to the music he could feel under her skin. The crescendo of the music increased in loveliness as they bent and swayed into each other like mirror images. Each time they flew apart from each other, Severus yearned to have her under his touch again.

With a giggle that rivaled the voices of angels, Lily broke from his grasp. It was with a mischievous look that he had missed dearly that she started to twirl in a wide arching circle. Her hair was lifted into the air, and returned noiselessly to her shoulders. The movement of her silken hair was delicate and feathery. Severus watched amusingly as the fluttering ribbons from her dress danced playfully in the air.

Lily, catching Severus's delighted face, threw her head back in a full laugh. Fast and faster she spun, until Severus could glimpse only the cream of her skin… the blood of her hair… the emerald of her eyes… Lily was the very apparition of illumination in physical form. She was positively lustrous with an aria.

The melody was achingly wonderful and grew more powerful with each measure. Finally finished her swirling, Lily took fleeting steps into Severus's arms. It seemed as though the music had transfixed them into a sacred spiral dance. He knew the light in Lily's eyes was identical to his own. Her eyes were so intense, he never wanted to look away. The rest of his life would be spent in bliss, if he could only stare into her eyes for all eternity.

As they became, once more, a part of the swirling throng, Severus watched Lily with fascination as she transformed before his eyes. One moment, he recognized the mossy eyes from the face of a ten year old he had originally fallen in love with. With the next heart stopping turn, Lily was the fifteen year old, fiery to defend him at the lake. It seemed that with each new note, Lily reached an age reborn, staring back at him, reminding him of all the years he had loved her.

Finally, he realized she had settled on a final image. Her last bodily composition was the last one he could remember. She was the reflection of the woman he had last seen alive. This was Lily at age twenty, the height of her beauty. Severus could feel his heart swell and break at the same time. She had been on the cusp of life, with a new family and a familiar love. It had been taken away from her, all because of his own mistake.

There must have been a bottomless guilt in his face, for Lily brought her hand up to brush it across his visage. The music grew more passionate as she grazed the lines on his face with her fingernails. She gave slight shakes of her head, as though to wipe away his guilt. A soft smile made its way deftly onto her face and as she turned it onto him directly, Severus could not help but return it.

Upon seeing this, Lily's expression was of pure merriment. She had never been more enchanting to Severus before. The music collided, leaving a pause in which Lily consumed each particle of his mind.

Within the halting moment, Severus slid his eyes shut, and, in the climax of the music, felt his whispers of love mingle with Lily's. Their breath was heated the moment before it ceased to exist between the two.

Then, there was complete silence, as nothing would distract them from this moment.

Full of ecstasy, Severus knew what it was to kiss an empyreal body of blazing sunshine. The kiss was entirely pure, the silence was crystal clear. The tips of his fingers touched the ends of hair, and he thought he would burst with adoration. Her hands rested on his chest, he could feel the burn through all the fabric.

And then, with a demon's breath, a thick harshness caused a shift in their moment.

Through shut eyes, he could tell tears were falling, like the first few notes of the piano. Pulling away from his elixir, Severus bore his eyes into Lily's. They were moist with tears that left tracks on her lovely face.

"I'm so sorry, Sev," her haunting whisper brought about the sound of the symphony. This was surely the music of truth unfurling slowly, casting a terrible shadow.

As the darkness fell between them, Severus felt his last image of Lily slip under his gaze. The last bit of her to remain in his focus was her viridian eyes gazing into his onyx ones.

Music of immense dysphoria left his hearing, note by note. It was soon replaced by a voice as gentle as Lily's, but much deeper.

"Severus? Severus?"

With a thin hand on his shoulder, Severus felt himself being shaken awake. With a retched feeling, he ripped his eyes open. As he expected, bright green no longer filled his gaze. Rather, a bright blue had taken its place.

"My apologies, Headmaster. The mood, it seems, has stirred me into slumber," Severus spoke carefully, trying hard to keep anguish out of his voice.

Albus Dumbledore gazed down at Severus, as though sizing him up, judging him in a thoughtful way. There must have been something pitiable in Severus's appearance for Dumbledore had decided not to reprimand him for sleeping.

"Alas, dear Severus, sleep happens to the best of us," he said, his voice low and comforting. "Even if our nightmares do make us out to be our worst." It would seem that Dumbledore at least had some idea of who Severus dreamed of constantly.

It was difficult to look away from the wizened old face, and Severus barely had the energy to do so. But the beating of his heart was frantic, and Severus only wanted to move as fast as his heart raced.

Without a further word, he swept out of the castle, his robes trailing behind him. Once in the garden, looking for love-struck couples to lash out against, Severus reflected on Dumbledore's words.

"_Even if our nightmares do make us out to be our worst."_

"But even worse are our dreams that make us our worst," Severus whispered out loud. He meant the words for Dumbledore, but he was sure Lily could hear them.

Severus could almost hear a reply as dulcet as a harp. With daring hope, Severus wondered if Lily's reply would be one of love. However, the words were indistinguishable as a symphony rang out in his ears.

* * *

Oh, my heart! One of the most touching moments in DH was when you found out about how Snape felt about Lily.

_"After all this time, Severus?"_

_"Always."_

That was so beautiful. I hoped to make this one shot just as poignant and bittersweet. I honestly think this is one of the most lyrical pieces I have ever written.


End file.
